EL PASO COUNTY — Rather than joy and cheer, this holiday season brings a feeling of dread for one in three women in Southern Colorado and one in seven men, according to the National Domestic Violence Hotline. They are the silent victims of domestic violence.
This time of year can be the hardest for them, as victims are home with their abusers, and feel unsafe, asking for help. But they will soon have a new champion in El Paso County, which sees hundreds of domestic violence cases each month thanks to the creation of a special prosecutor position at the district attorney's office.
The additional resources offers a glimmer of hope for victims who fear the ramifications of taking their intimate partner to court.
"It's just the first opportunity that we've had to go into a position like this to be more effective, generally speaking, on domestic violence cases. And this is across the nation, generally, about a 30% success rate on domestic violence prosecutions. That's much too low in an area that's got a real big need for being very effective in that area," said District Attorney Michael Allen.
This is the first time the 4th Judicial District will have a specialized prosecutor focusing solely on domestic violence cases. He acknowledges the best person for the role has skills beyond the courtroom.
"You've got to have empathy to do these types of cases. These are tough cases to deal with. People are going through a lot of emotional change at the same time that they're dealing with a domestic violence criminal case," Allen said.
According to data from the district attorney's office, in the last five years, the number of domestic violence cases in El Paso County remained above 250 per month, with a visible increase during the summertime. But, there is no clear sign of any surge in cases around the holidays.
"But that doesn't mean domestic violence isn't happening, and it's happening way too often," Allen said.
According to the Colorado Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board's 2023 annual report, 94 people died in Colorado as a result of domestic violence last year. That's an eight-year high. Of those, 39 were the intended targets of the violence, 33 the abusers, and a startling quarter of the deaths, are who the board defines as collateral victims.
The review board's data show, 23 percent of those killed were collateral victims, including neighbors, law enforcement, and family who tried to intervene. Six were children: an 8-month-old, two five-year-olds, a six-year-old, an eight-year-old, and a 16-year-old all lost their lives as a result of domestic violence.
But while the district attorney's data may not reflect a spike in cases during the holidays…experts say that's because victims have limited access to report their abuse this time of year.
"You can't turn to your friends or family in the holidays. And your kids, animals, whatever may be with you because they're not going to school or whatever the case may be. So the teachers aren't seeing it. Nobody else is seeing it but you and so and you don't know how to say anything," said Misty Medders.
Medders works with Break the Silence, run out of Mount Carmel Veterans Service Center in the Springs. In her office are the faces of who she calls fallen angels; women who did not survive their abuse.
A victim of domestic violence herself, Medders works to connect survivors with local resources which she says they need this time of year.
"They get you in a solitary situation. So even for the holidays, 'No, you can't go to your parents. No, you can't go to your friends,' or they've eliminated the friends in the family altogether because of their controlling nature. So a lot of people are stuck in that situation, and they don't really feel like they know where to go," Medders said.
According to the non-profit Haven, the holidays can be an especially difficult time for those in unsafe relationships as experiences that can cause stress increase, like spending time with family, traveling, financial strain, and alcohol use.
In its 2023 annual report, the Colorado Domestic Violence Fatality Review Board found a concerning trend in its case studies that only a few people in the victims' lives knew they felt unsafe.
"Family members were most likely to know of the abuse, but the awareness stood at 38% of the dvf [domestic violence fatality] victim's parents and 25% of siblings. Law enforcement was aware in only 25% of cases and there was no indication that any dv shelters knew of the dv," the report said.
Medder says that's is why it's so important to speak up if there is someone in your life who you believe could the victim of abuse.
"Say something to your boss. Say something to the police. Document it. Because if you document it, then they can document it. You have that track, you have that trail, you have something that legal can go off of," Medders said.
Medders says expressing your concern can help them see you as a lifeline later on. Medders suggests trying a hypothetical scenerio in conversation.
"Like, 'I had a friend. She wasn't safe, but I let her know that I'm a safe place to come.' And that way you're not saying it to them, but you're saying it to them," Medders said.
With the faces of these fallen angels looking on, Medders says she's pleased the district attorney is hiring a special prosecutor to help domestic violence victims before they lose their fight.
"Very much, very much because if we have an advocate behind us that is trained, that knows that it's going to hear us. That can make all the difference in the world,"
If you know someone who feels unsafe or you think you may need to talk to someone about your relationship, reach out to Break the Silence or the National Domestic Violence hotlineto talk, text, or chat for free confidentially.
If you think you could be in a life-threatening situation, don't hesitate to call 911.
Have a story you'd like News5 Investigates to look into? Send an email to News5Investigates@KOAA.com.
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